I hope that you’ve been enjoying our series on energy hygiene so far! Over the past few weeks, we’ve covered things like how to tell if you need energy hygiene, how to set a healthy filter, and how to ground and release things that don’t serve you. And today I want to delve into the idea of energetic cords- what they are, where they come from, and how they may be interfering with your ability to live a free and joyful life. You may have heard of this concept before, perhaps in your therapist’s office, or at a new age fair, and these cords are often described in many different ways. In truth, it’s nearly impossible to walk through life without creating any energetic cords, which is why it’s so important to learn how to recognize and release them. I like to use this example to illustrate the idea of energetic cords: Imagine you are driving down the highway, and you see a stranded car up ahead, halted by a flat tire. Perhaps you have the time, energy, and expertise to help this fellow driver in trouble, so you pull over and help her change her tire, make sure it’s safe, and go on your merry way. Many of us would be comfortable with this scenario; after all, it’s the kind and compassionate thing to do. But what if, instead, you help her change her tire, ask her where she’s headed, hop in the backseat of her car, and try to help her navigate to her destination, all the while abandoning your car on the side of the highway?

That is what an energetic cord is like- we form an attachment to a certain person and a certain outcome, and this weaves a cord from our energy to theirs. Nobody can do this without our permission, and the cords you are carrying right now are the result of you allowing, or more often inviting, them to be there. Some people view energetic cords in a very fearful and dark way, as if they were products of dark magic or some kind of energetic attack. But in truth, we form cords when we become invested in someone else’s life, and on some level, we wish to control their choices or actions. Most of the time, this motivation comes from a place of wanting to help- our instinct to rescue when we see others struggling. I don’t know about you, but that sounds like the majority of relationships I know!

All of this is related to something I like to call the “free will clause”, which states that as our souls have come here into human form, we are free to learn, grow, create, etc…as long as we do not interfere with others’ free will to do the same. Whenever we get invested in the outcome of a path that does not belong to us, we give our life force energy away in our attempt to control, and this creates an energetic cord. When we insert our energy, we tamper with the other person’s free will, violating this clause, and we end up with a cord that may go on to last for years and years.

But you may be saying, what’s wrong with giving our energy to others? Especially when we are just trying to help? Well, in many situations, this has the potential to turn into an energy donor/energy taker relationship, where the donor becomes depleted, and over time, the taker remains stuck, unable to move on without the donor’s energetic sacrifice. This situation isn’t helpful for either party, despite the initial boost that they both may feel. When we survive off of someone else’s “juice”, we aren’t doing the work to connect to our own, sustainable source of power. I believe that one of the most important things that we souls are here to learn is how to access our own source of power within us. And energetic cords get in the way of that learning process! 

Many people are willing to sacrifice their own energy if they think it will help someone they care about- especially mothers. But when we do this, in essence, we are giving a vote of no confidence in that other person, as well as the unique path that they are meant to be walking. This may come from a caring place, but it is just another means of control. When we can all step back, be strong in our own power, and lead by example, all parties involved can relax and learn their own lessons in their own way. After all, my way isn’t going to look like your way, and vice versa. And that’s perfectly okay!

Chances are good that you are carrying around energetic cords from your childhood, your past romantic relationships, and any current entanglements from your career, interactions with authority figures, and the like. There is a process to cutting these kinds of cords, which we’ll go into more depth on next week. But for now, understanding how they work and how they may not be serving your highest and best, is the perfect place to start.

Have more questions? Write a comment below, or use my contact form to learn more about energetic cords and how I can help you release them!